Clarity Begins Where Control Ends: JB's Monday Momentum #33
"The outcome may be uncertain, but the effort never is. Peace lives where we stop trying to predict and start trying to become."
Estimated reading time: five minutes
Welcome to Monday Momentum, the weekly newsletter where I discuss practical wisdom, uncovering insights to enhance our lives one thoughtful moment at a time. While I have confidence in the ideas I write about, I am still learning them. I acknowledge that what works for me may not work for everyone. Take each idea as you see fit and let me know what you think!
Hello friend,
After a mix of writer’s block and misaligned priorities, I’m happy to say Monday Momentum is back after over two months.
Over the past couple of months, this newsletter has been consistently in the back of my mind. Brainstorming ideas, wondering if a certain idea was worth exploring, how I’d execute it, and whether it would meet the standard I’d set for myself. All that second-guessing made me lose track of why I started this letter in the first place and eventually led me to stop writing.
After some reflection, I reminded myself of the original purpose: to share thoughts on ideas I find important. In my very first letter, I wrote, “I’ll be sharing lessons, ideas, and thoughts.” I didn’t say they’d be perfect or universally agreeable. Just honest reflections worth sharing.
So to kick off what I’ll call “season two” of Monday Momentum, I want to return to an idea I believe is one of the most important in life: letting go of what you can’t control. I’ve written about this before, but lately, I’ve struggled to follow my own advice. So, let’s revisit this idea together.
If you missed the last edition—“Dare to be Different”—you can click here to check it out.
One last thing before we dive in, I want to give a quick shoutout to my friend Vince1. He recently started his own Substack and has been putting out great pieces. I’ve linked his page here. If you enjoy what I write about, you’ll appreciate his work too.
A Question I am Contemplating:
What would my life look like if I only focused on what I can control?
Lately, I’ve caught myself giving too much energy to things I have no real control over. Hoping a situation unfolds a certain way. Worrying about what someone might be thinking. Mentally reworking something that’s already happened. It clouds my thinking. And worst of all, it leaves me with little energy for the parts of life I can influence.
Everything you give attention to is something else you can’t give attention to. When my focus is scattered—worries, people, possibilities—it’s not just that I’m distracted; I’m drained for no clear reason. Wasting energy on things we have zero influence over isn’t just unproductive, it’s tiring.
Epictetus puts it bluntly: “There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.”
I come back to that line often. It reminds me that peace doesn’t come from focusing on every tiny thing. It comes from letting go of the things I never had control over in the first place. It is hard. But it is freeing.
There are always things within reach. How I respond. What I choose to think about. Whether I go for the run or pick up the book or write the words. These things are in my control. They’re quiet things. Small things. But they build something. And when I actually focus on them—when I do the work, without obsessing over the outcome—I feel more complete.
I’m trying to remind myself that if I’ve done everything I can—if I’ve given honest effort, been thoughtful, stayed true to who I want to be—then that’s enough. Whatever happens after that is out of my hands. Letting that be enough, truly enough, is the real challenge.
I don’t always succeed. I still check back in with the outcome. Still replay how it went. Still wonder what could’ve been different. But learning that detaching from the result isn’t about giving up—it’s about giving yourself a chance to grow in the right direction.
The outcome may be uncertain, but the effort never is. Peace lives where we stop trying to predict and start trying to become.
Quote on control (and letting go of it):
“Everything that happens is either endurable or not. If it’s endurable, then endure it. Stop complaining. If it’s unendurable… then stop complaining. Your destruction will mean its end as well. Just remember: you can endure anything your mind can make endurable, by treating it as in your interest to do so. In your interest, or in your nature.” — Marcus Aurelius2
Goal for the Week:
Refocus on the mental side of life: reading, writing, reflection3.
Lately, I’ve been more disciplined than ever when it comes to the physical side of my life. But the introspective side has slipped. I haven’t been reading much, my writing has stalled, and journaling has fallen off. I believe the mental and physical sides of life are equally important and that a well-lived life balances both. This week, I’m aiming to realign and get back to intentional reflection.
Letters From a Stoic — Seneca (31% done)
What I’m listening to (one podcast, one artist, one song):
Modern Wisdom with Chris Williamson: #922 – Naval Ravikant – 44 Harsh Truths About Human Nature4
Clay Street Unit
“Don’t Let Me Down” — The Beatles
Thanks for reading! Don't forget to subscribe to stay updated for the next edition and feel free to leave a comment. I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Take care,
James
Vince was one of my basketball coaches during my senior year of high school, but he quickly became a friend. Throughout the season, we had conversations about many of the same topics I explore in this newsletter. A couple of months ago, I was excited to learn that he started his own Substack. Vince brings a unique perspective; he’s lived all over the world (currently in Singapore) and always has something insightful to share. I recommend checking out his work.
Taken from Meditations Book 10.3. It is actually my favorite line from the book.
I also think one reason my ideas for the newsletter stalled in the first place was because I wasn’t reading as much. It’s obvious, but still worth saying: if you want something to be a key part of your life—like writing for me—you need to stay immersed in the world around it. The more you engage with similar ideas, the more naturally your own will start to come.
If there were one podcast to listen to on repeat for the rest of your life, this would be it. It might be the most important thing you listen to all year. Please take the time and listen to the conversation. It can change your life if taken to heart.
I continue to be impressed by you. Keep them coming
Season 2 Tmu